Self Portrait 4

Look ma I'm using color! 👨‍🎨

Over the past few years, I've slowly realized my definition of success. All of the things I wanted became mine to have, and goals once distant grew near, eventually even disappearing into my rearview mirror. However, much to my simultaneous surprise and chagrin, I found that I was unhappier than ever before. I won't bore you with a lengthy account of the path I took looking for answers, but in short, I found that mindfulness meditation in conjunction with talk therapy could move that happiness needle in a way that material gains never could.

Recently, these tools enabled me to have an experience in which the veneer of the world as I had known it seemed to peel away. My vision had turned from grayscale to color, and I saw my life with a clarity previously unknown to me. Over time my clear vision became cloudier, and my happiness as ephemeral as it ever was. Nonetheless, I wanted to capture that feeling of existential purity in an illustration. This was an important experience for me, and I'm grateful to have had it.